The Summer Transfer Window Thread 2014/15

[EddieG]

If he keeps taking that amount of shots, who cares? He's obviously going to get the goals in, let him miss 50 if that's what it takes.

[Nerf]

A striker that's averaged more than 1 goal in two since moving to Milan 'can't score'?

No, a striker that's taken 219 shots to score 17 goals 'can't score.'

Where do you get your stats from?

Is that supposed to sound so dismissive? Because I'm not sure whether you legit want me to supply my source or you're mocking me

If he keeps taking that amount of shots, who cares? He's obviously going to get the goals in, let him miss 50 if that's what it takes.

What a ridiculous sentiment. Rickie Lambert would score more goals from less shots, why not play him if goals is the end game?

[Gazz]

Rich is an horny auditor, he never jokes about sex or numerical data.

[Rich]

I was not being dismissive, if I was I would have called you a name too, you poopyhead

[Thrilla]

Why not?

Spurs could sell £24m worth of afro wigs easily.

Lineker has already got his!

[Gazz]

And he didn't even pay for it, typical Jew.

[Rich]

Oh he pays for it, he pays for it everyday.

[ChrisSteeleAteMyHamster]

We've probably got a few afro wigs floating around White Hart Lane from Assou-Ekotto's year of popularity.

[EddieG]

A striker that's averaged more than 1 goal in two since moving to Milan 'can't score'?

No, a striker that's taken 219 shots to score 17 goals 'can't score.'

Where do you get your stats from?

Is that supposed to sound so dismissive? Because I'm not sure whether you legit want me to supply my source or you're mocking me

If he keeps taking that amount of shots, who cares? He's obviously going to get the goals in, let him miss 50 if that's what it takes.

What a ridiculous sentiment. Rickie Lambert would score more goals from less shots, why not play him if goals is the end game?

.. so he doesn't score enough, but at the same time goals isn't the end game?

Just what the fuck are you expecting out of him?

Eugh, don't even answer I won't read it.

[Gazz]

This feud is worse than Gazz versus Krone.

[Rich]

Would you rather have Rickie Lambert scoring 10 from 20 shots of Balotelli scoring 20 from 400 shots in the same amount of games though?

Rickie Lambert may be more efficient, but Balotelli scores more goals in this scenario, I would still take Mario over Rickie

[Nerf]

Would you rather have Rickie Lambert scoring 10 from 20 shots of Balotelli scoring 20 from 400 shots in the same amount of games though?

Rickie Lambert may be more efficient, but Balotelli scores more goals in this scenario, I would still take Mario over Rickie

I'd rather give Rickie those 400 shots...

A striker that's averaged more than 1 goal in two since moving to Milan 'can't score'?

No, a striker that's taken 219 shots to score 17 goals 'can't score.'

Where do you get your stats from?

Is that supposed to sound so dismissive? Because I'm not sure whether you legit want me to supply my source or you're mocking me

If he keeps taking that amount of shots, who cares? He's obviously going to get the goals in, let him miss 50 if that's what it takes.

What a ridiculous sentiment. Rickie Lambert would score more goals from less shots, why not play him if goals is the end game?

.. so he doesn't score enough, but at the same time goals isn't the end game?

Just what the fuck are you expecting out of him?

Eugh, don't even answer I won't read it.

What the fuck are you even talking about?

[Gazz]

DONE DEAL

Paul Gascoigne has signed for Abbey in the Bournemouth Sunday League Division Four.

[Plubby]

Who the hell is this Mattia Destro fellow that Chelsea are being linked with this week?

The go to latest beast striker on FM so that's where that story has come from.

You're in for a young Portuguese striker called To Madeira too.

[Rich]

Would you rather have Rickie Lambert scoring 10 from 20 shots of Balotelli scoring 20 from 400 shots in the same amount of games though?

Rickie Lambert may be more efficient, but Balotelli scores more goals in this scenario, I would still take Mario over Rickie

I'd rather give Rickie those 400 shots...

My point is, Mario, while missing more chances, likely gets more of the ball and has more goal scoring opportunities, Rickie just wouldn't have the chance where Mario does.

AND WHERE DO YOU GET YOUR STATS FROM? STOP AVOIDING THE QUESTION!

[Mad Jack]

Would you rather have Rickie Lambert scoring 10 from 20 shots of Balotelli scoring 20 from 400 shots in the same amount of games though?

Rickie Lambert may be more efficient, but Balotelli scores more goals in this scenario, I would still take Mario over Rickie

I'd rather give Rickie those 400 shots...

Rickie is unlikely to get into 400 shooting positions in an entire season.

[EddieG]

Is this really boiling down to Nerf saying Lambert is a better striker than Balotelli?

[Nerf]

From a strictly goalscoring perspective, yes, but there's more to it than that obviously.

Anyway, £16m fee agreed apparently. Did I mention that I fucking love Super Mario and he's the best striker in the world?

[Rich]

No, but you did mention something about how handsome Rickie Lambert is.

[Mad Jack]

Lambert does have a case of the handsomes.

One thing we're missing at United is the handsome factor we used to have, going back as far as big Duncan Edwards.