Ananas

A couple of notes that weren't in any of the press releases directly: - A 24 two hour event occurring between Days 6 and 7 will air November 23rd. - Video previews for a ton of the new series can be found here. - Scrubs cast three new recurring characters to be played by Aziz Ansari, Betsy Beutler and Eliza Coupe. Many will recognize Aziz Ansari as one of the stars of the MTV comedy series "Human Giant". Also, as a result of necessary budget cuts in bringing "Scrubs" to ABC, each cast member (including Braff) will take two episodes off during the course of the season. Not sure how that's going to work with the voice-overs. And according to Bill Lawrence, the series will return to its more grounded dramedy roots of the first few seasons. This is good news. - Dollhouse and Fringe will be the first subjects of FOX's experimental "Remote Free TV" strategy. Essentially, this means that FOX will limit ad sales to 5 minutes per hour, those making each episode 55 minutes long.

Last but first in the ratings, FOX's 2008/09 Schedule: Pilot descriptions available at The Futon Critic. So this looks like one of the strongest schedules FOX has had in a while. We all know "Fringe" is a marquee pilot, and so is every JJ Abrams pilot even if they've been met with mixed results post-"Lost". "Cloverfield's" shit-hot, "Lost" is the most watched show in the world, so I can't think of many smarter investments for a network than attaching themselves to him. This fall the schedule will actually be bolstered by *gasp* several successful scripted returning programs not named "House". Although "Prison Break" may have lost some (read: a lot) momentum last year, Monday will be anchored my last year's most successful freshman scripted program, "Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles". In addition to pulling in decent numbers, the show also improved greatly in the second half of its debut season. "House" and "Fringe" is just the smart pairing of a massive hit with a high potential new series. Wednesday sees the pairing of of a couple of silently successful returning programs, "Bones" and "'Til Death". And meanwhile, "Back to You" bit the bullet after just one season. Everybody may love Raymond, but in the battle of Robert vs. Deb, there is a clear winner. "Do Not Disturb" sounds awful, but so does "'Til Death". And it is. But sometimes a TV viewer just wants crap, apparently. Thursday and Friday are full of reality TV. My DVR says thank you for the break. In the midseason, the "American Idol" juggernaut returns to dislodge much of the schedule, but the programming decisions here are still pretty good. Whedon fans should not despair in "Dollhouse's" January launch, its pairing with "24" clearly indicates the network has good intentions. Wednesday's Fall line-up moves to the Friday of doom, but a brief glance at everyone else's schedule seems to indicate that people are looking to take chances with legitimate Sunday-Friday programming. As for "The Cleveland Show" on Sundays, I thought "American Dad" was the defacto "Family Guy" spin-off? 3 kindred themed shows based in one central universe, isn't that an overextension? Anyway, "Sit Down, Shut Up" has a great pedigree for success, so they've got plenty of potential to at very least continue to put up very competitive numbers on Saturday. Less reality trash, two highly buzzworthy drama pilots. What a difference a year makes for FOX.

CBS Fall Schedule (From the Futon Critic): In addition, murder mystery "Harper's Island" will debut and "Rules of Engagement" will return at midseason. CBS' audience is too old to know what the internet is hence no pilot descriptions on the website, but The Futon Critic's release has them. So CBS' programming is what it is. We're all about three decades shy of their target demographic, and so I can't really say if this is a schedule that's going to help them get any stronger than they already are. "The Mentalist" sounds cliched and silly, but I have a sinking suspicion that most of the Eye's audience have just fallen asleep with the TV on, so the ratings will be counted and no one will remember hating it. "Eleventh Hour" I know nothing about, but considering it's Bruckheimer it'll probably be a hit. "The Ex List" sounds like an awful rom-com movie spread out over multiple episodes. Yuck. And as for the new sitcoms... what can I say? They usually sound bad on premise alone. "Big Bang Theory" sounded like awful lowest common denominator garbage and turned out surprisingly awesome. "Worst Week" is a new series awarded the coveted "Two And a Half Men" slot, so maybe there's something to that. "Project Gary" however has Paula Marshall so I think we can safely conclude it'll be cancelled after 4 episodes. But really, how could I be mad? They brought back "How I Met Your Mother" and "Big Bang Theory" and left them right where they are. They switched "Survivor" over to HD. They... okay that's all the CBS programming I watch (and even "Survivor" usually not). Just like The CW's programming may skew to young for us, CBS is the number one network in the geriatrics ward, and they've not developed a single show here that's going to change that. But hey, everyone's got to find their niche. Let NBC, FOX and ABC fight for the young affluent viewers, when Freedent and Depends are looking for somewhere to advertise, they've got but one place to go!

I couldn't find my all-time favorite (The Norm Show seasons 2 and 3), so I'll go with the best of this year.

The CW's Fall Sked (The Futon Critic): Pilot descriptions available at CWTV.com Wow. This is the least varied a network schedule I think I've ever seen. So you start the week with 4 shows, all teen soaps and 3 of which about rich kids. Then you go with 2 fashion themed reality shows. Then you've got the sci-fi night. And Friday they stick their remaining sitcoms where their older skewing audiences can find it. The demo's for the CW's audience from Monday-Thursday isn't going to include much variety. They tried to light the 18-34 crowd on fire with "Gossip Girl", and I guess they half succeeded so perhaps they figured a re-branding was in order. The reality is that it's actually a step backwards; away from whatever small diversity points they'd been trying to earn with shows like "Life is Wild", "Runaways" or their urban adult sitcoms like "The Game" and "Girlfriends". As if their were ever any doubt, this is the teen network. And maybe that's not such a bad thing. MTV's "reality" soaps aimed at teenagers have become tabloid star-making hits. Disney Channel has become THE major player in the tween crowd with placement in 10 million less households, with "High School Musical 2" scoring more viewers than any CW/WB/UPN broadcast in history. Perhaps CW is setting itself up to become the defacto spot for the emerging post-Disney crowd; hormonal teenagers can only survive on Hannah Montana and Zoey 101 for so long. In the short term they lose a couple of their moderate ratings successes. "Smackdown" heads over to become the flagship program of the fledgling MyNetworkTV, while the rebrand sees the end of reality franchises "Beauty And the Geek" and "Pussy Cat Dolls Present...". In the end they replace it with perhaps the buzzworthy pilot of the year in the "90210" remake and develop a number of different possible companion pieces. Are many of us going to like much of what The CW has to offer in 2008/09? Doubtful. Is this good strategy? Probably. At least they gave us another "Reaper" season (it returns midseason for another 13 episodes).

The Futon Critic has a list of what's in, out and coming back for next season here, but in case you don't want to click over: CBS Renewed: Amazing Race, Big Bang Theory, Cold Case, Criminal Minds, All CSI shows, Ghost Whisperer, How I Met Your Mother, NCIS, New Adventures of Old Christine, Numb3rs, Rules of Engagement, Survivor, Two And a Half Men, The Unit, Without A Trace Cancelled: Cane, Jericho (not for all the peanuts in the world), Moonlight (could have been renewed but Warner wouldn't pony up more of the production budget), Secret Talents of the Stars, Shark, Viva Laughlin, Welcome To the Captain FOX Renewed: American Dad, American Idol, King of the Hill, Kitchen Nightmares, Prison Break, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, 'Til Death, 24 Cancelled: Back to You, K-Ville, Nashville, New Amsterdam, The Return of the Jezebel James Everything else is not necessarily in doubt, just not formally renewed yet. It's not like there's any real notion that Bones, House or The Simpsons are going anywhere, just FOX is keeping its developments close to its sleave. Back to You, just cancelled by FOX on Monday, has received interest from CBS.

CBS tomorrow, FOX Thursday, but I'll try to make up a list of what's already in and out in a few minutes.

ABC's Fall 2008 Schedule (Courtesy of The Futon Critic): They didn't release a winter schedule, although that will see the return of "Lost", "According to Jim", "The Bachelor" and the ABC debut of "Scrubs" as well as new series "The Goode Family" and a reality series from Ashton Kutcher and Tyra Banks. ABC has nothing in the way of pilot descriptions, but The Futon Critic's coverage does. What I see here is some smart, stable programming. They didn't overdo it with new reality series (only 2) which I like, and they both seem like they could drive some solid ratings home for the Alphabet. Other than that, they've got a sort of embarassment of riches here. Monday, Wednesday, Thursday and Sunday were all winning nights for the network, so there was no need to tinker (although they did drop the low rated "Big Shots" in favour of their highly anticipated remake of the British series "Life on Mars"). They moved "Boston Legal" to Monday to hold off the inconsistent "The Bachelor" until mid-season, making room for a 13 episode order of "Eli Stone" Tuesdays at 10pm. I'm over the moon about this. That show started slow and gained consistent momentum to the point where the last episode was exceptional. Great characters, an intriguing concept and wonderful stories. Hopefully it picks up steam ratings wise in season two. In the midseason, I'm thrilled about the "Scrubs" pickup, and it probably makes business sense for the network from a DVD and syndication standpoint (more so than NBC which never produced the series and thus didn't make that money off of it). "The Goode Family" is an intriguing animated comedy from Mike Judge, a man who's had his two series go a combined 19 seasons. There's something to be said for consistency, and that right there is consistency. I suppose the "According to Jim" pickup means some sort of all-comedy block in the winter with "Samantha Who", "The Goode Family" and "Scrubs". And, of course, the "Lost" bandwagon gets back into gear in the winter too, giving the network yet another ratings boost. It's kind of hard to even remember 4 years ago when you couldn't pay people to watch this network. Now they're on top, and they're making all the right moves to stay there.

The 2007 Upfront makes no mention of ER being in its final season, so I guess it was probably just looked at as a possibility. They probably just looked at their pilot roster and realized they had nothing to replace it with.

So this is the week where all 5 networks present their fall schedules to advertisers. NBC is up first, although technically they announced their schedule a month ago in an attempt to one up their competitors. 90% of the next season's ad-sales will come out of the next few weeks, so let the groveling begin! NBC's 2008-09 Schedule (Courtesy of The Futon Critic): Program descriptions are available at NBC's Fall Preview Site. So as for the fall schedule, I have no interest in "My Own Worst Enemy", "Kath & Kim" (Australia now? What, did Ben Silverman run out of Latin American shows to rip off?), or for that matter SNL doing all political primetime episodes. I will however give a chance to "Knight Rider", the telemovie of which was not awful. "Crusoe" also interests me, although I wonder how much faith in it they really have to debut it on Fridays. I'm also happy to see "Life" returning, although it's a shame they opted for it to get the Friday death slot while giving the cushy Wednesdays at 10pm gig to "Lipstick Jungle". I'm not sure how I feel about an "Office" spin-off, destined to debut in January. While I do thoroughly enjoy the show, it did seem to hurt a bit towards the end of the four hour-long episodes that opened the season. Could this be an over-extension of the brand? Only time will tell. Sunday's winter pairing of "Merlin" and "Kings" intrigues me, but only because they have the potential to be either a lot of fun or just miserable. "Kings" is told in a modern day setting, but "Merlin" I'm not sure about. It claims to be the story of a young Merlin and Arthur "through 21st century storytelling". I'm not sure what that means. Other than that, "XIII" sounds awesome and everything else I don't care about. Will it help NBC's sagging ratings? I doubt it. I guess it depends on the strength of their reality programming, but reality is such a crapshoot because it really is usually the worst shit that ends up popping the biggest rating. "Knight Rider" may have started strong with the solid ratings for the movie (although one with an "American Gladiators" lead-in), but "Bionic Woman" started big too and fell apart because they couldn't keep it interesting. What almost certainly isn't here is a break-out hit. Unless one of the sophomore programs catches fire, I would predict another 4th place finish for the network. Coming tomorrow: ABC and The CW.

It just helped give BJ the pent up rage he couldn't get today from entering to Slipknot.

I generally hate R&B, but Ne-Yo's new song Closer is awesome.

Dude. Carson Daly is at 1:30 and could have very well been their choice. How can you possibly not look at this as a bullet dodged?

The movies Apatow is involved in without Apatow regulars are shit like "Fun With Dick and Jane", "Celtic Pride" and "The Cable Guy". Seriously, next to no one expects anything out of this one except for Sandler fans, and even though I'm occasionally an apologist for him (I genuinely liked "Click", for instance), this doesn't even look good by Happy Madison standards, much less Apatowverse-worthy.

I'm giving them through the weekend series in KC before I panic. We'll have Rolen back in the lineup, and with guys like Mac, Scutaro and Inglett seeing time we need him just to have another bat who can get the ball out of the infield. Rolen's power could have a big impact, in that with Rios, Wells, Rolen and Stairs you'll have four legit 25+ home run threats. They need one of these guys to really step up and put the fear in opposing pitching. With the 5-tool talents of Rios and Wells, I'd say the latter two are better candidates to get the green light to start swinging more aggressively. As long as they can take tonight and at least two of three in KC, they won't have lost the season in April. EDIT: Just to be clear they won't have LOST the season in April if they can't, but it'll definitely suck and be time to start taking a real hard look at what's wrong with the team.

What part? Chapter president of the Mendoza club? He had one good series and has been awful since. You wanna give 10 million to that? Thomas would have become a problem and was openly turning on the club and it was better to get rid of him. Personally I would have tried to waive him to Syracuse and see if someone took the expensive problem off our hands. Wouldn't have hurt to keep Reed around, but at the time we were high on Stewart and they are trying to keep room for Adam Lind and eventually work Travis Snider in. And Johnny Mac is great defensively, but so is Eckstein and MUCH better at the plate. They could be giving Mac some time at third, but whoever sees time there is just the placeholder until Rolen's ready anyway. Agreed on Burnett, but everyone knows that. But Ryan is useless in light of Accardo? Is that some kind of joke? Accardo is marginal as a set-up man, and proved two weeks ago why he's got no business closing out games. BJ Ryan is DOMINANT. Physically he's about 90% there, but if you watch him he's back 100% mentally (maybe better than before). He's just so cool under pressure, he shakes everything off and makes the right pitch. BJ Ryan is a star closer. Jeremy Accardo is barely a closer. Stairs is hitting .333 this year. He hit .289 last year with 21 home runs in 30 less games than Thomas. He also comes 6 million dollars cheaper, and can double as a utility position player. Hold a candle? He blows Thomas' out. Why would you possibly be upset at dumping 10 million dollars of dead weight from the books? They just awarded big (earned) contracts to Alex Rios and Aaron Hill, and they've got Shaun Marcum coming up for arbitration at the end of the year. Why you'd get rid of a multi-tooled first baseman like Overbay in order to keep a more expensive, entirely washed up slugger like Thomas is beyond me but hey, to each his own. Similar defensive skills, and far superior offensive skills. Eckstein is a no brainer. I'd also rather have Inglett as a utility infielder than Mac, at least Inglett has a bit more of a future. Again, it's more about the talent that's not there yet than the talent that is. If they need to turn to someone, they'll turn to the young guys they're big on. Accardo has two loses and a blown save already this season, whereas the newly reactivated Ryan hasn't surrendered a run in 3 innings of work and also struck out the side Saturday. If you want a Miguel Batista type "keep things interesting" closer then fine, but I'd rather my closer be "lights out".

Definitely. He's got a sort of Bill Withers meets James Taylor vibe. Plus "Sweet Pea" reminds me of "Daydream" by Lovin' Spoonful, so that's an automatic win in my eyes. Great singer.

Not punk, but during the nu-metal era there was a pretty awesome metal-rap collabo album called "Loud Rocks", the most notable song being the Wu-Tang ft. Tom Morello and Chad Smith version of "Wu-Tang Clan Ain't Nuthing ta Fuck Wit". You've got bands like System of a Down, Sugar Ray, Static-X, Crazy Town, Sevendust, Ozzy, Incubus and Finger Eleven collaborating with the likes of Wu-Tang, The Liks, Dead Prez, Xzibit, Mobb Deep, M.O.P. and Big Pun. An album from that era that certainly fell by the wayside, but definitely worth checking out.

I've been a fan since he was so good at the BRITS last year. From there I checked out his first stand-up DVD (wonderful), TV series (sketchy, although I thought Ponderland was great) and finally got in a habit of downloading the podcast. I think the radio show is probably his best work because, as has been pointed out, he's funnier when he's being himself and not playing the "S&M Willy Wonka". The back and forths with Noel Gallagher and the occasional Noel Fielding appearance are great, and his recent interviews with his Forgetting Sarah Marshall co-stars (Seth Rogen was on this week) have been really fun. Great to see him absolutely KILL on Leno, because with the Sandler gig and the upcoming Judd Apatow movie, it's clear he's got plenty of backers in Hollywood.

In the past day, the new albums by Phantom Planet, Islands, Del tha Funkee Homosapien, Jack Johnson, She & Him and most recently The Presidents of the United States of America. In order of awesomeness: Islands, She & Him, Presidents, Phantom Planet, Del and JJ. All good records though. This was the first Jack Johnson record I've really been able to stick with from start to finish, so even though I rank it last doesn't mean it was bad. The production on Del's record was really dull, but he's a great MC so I have no problem sticking with it. Phantom Planet was samey but fun, and it may get better with subsequent listens. That Presidents holds up this well is honestly a shock to me. Just so silly, witty and fun not to mention more musical diverse than ever so I really enjoyed this one. She & Him was lovely; Zooey Deschanel has a wonderful voice and it rings as being sort of Neko Case-esque (which is good for me). And Islands... awesome. I have a feeling this one is going to take over my iPod like Neon Bible did this year. Just a wonderful record with no forgettable tracks. So... t'was a good day.

Now THAT is a fucking closer. BJ Ryan returns for his first appearance in a year, throws two great strikes, then makes a good pitch that Byrd manages to get his bat across and find the most impossible fucking gap and get himself a triple. And because BJ Ryan is fucking BJ Ryan he settles down, gets an easy grounder to short, a pop up to shallow left and a blooper to right to get out of it clean. Happy to see his pace, power and steady nerves back, because we're going to need him down the stretch. So the Jays swept Texas in Texas. I don't have the stats immediately in front of me, but I think it's probably safe to say that this hasn't happened in quite a while. Now we throw McGowan and Marcum against Baltimore, and hopefully we can come away with two more. Consistency is obviously going to be the key to being a contender this year.

Gregg Zaun stole home. Those are four words I'd never thought I'd ever see strung together.

Leafs suck. TFC sucks. Raptors will probably an early round exit. What else do we have to talk about?

You think that's bad? I'm working as an usher at the Jays game and in my three breaks so far the Jays have scored a combined 9 runs. Every time I go on break they bring the bats out. If they'd just let me sit in the break room for three hours I'm sure they'd be 81-0 at home this year.

Well... at least we scored.